Son of a Bitch!

I haven't ranted about this before, but I very well should and thus, I will.

Have you ever taken a stroll through Best Buy and taken a look at their laptops and computers and think to yourself, "wow, these are really cheap for their specifications." Of course you have.

Have you ever had a problem with a product you've purchased, ie: a laptop part, and for some reason or another you can't get through to customer support? Of course you have.

Let's go through the story of my beloved laptop that I will here, by this time forward, be named Mr. Snippets Jr. Why did I add 'Jr' to the end of it? Because the bastards didn't get it right the first time!

I bought the original Snippets from Best Buy in August of 2006. I thought it was the greatest thing. It had pretty much everything I wanted. 17 inch screen, a number pad, a better processor, it was XP, because I knew vista was coming out and I predicted it's total and utter shittyness (hate to say I told you so... but...).

I took the laptop up to Ottawa with my girlfriend for about 10 days. I was interested to try it out because I also do a lot of photography, or did at that point in time. I needed a USB capable device to transfer my compact flash from my cameras straight to my computer for easy viewing. And, lest it be known, I am a gamer. You could say it's a sweet-tooth of mine. So I had a few games on the computer for good measure. I had bought a few movies while I was up there, and after watching them with my girlfriend I decided to work on a few of my pictures, play my game for a while then go to sleep. The editing of my photos went smoothly, but when I got to my game that's when the problem aroused. While about an hour ago my laptop could read DVD's just fine, it somehow had "forgotten" how to read regular CD-Roms.

[insert W.T.F here]

I figured it was a corrupted driver, or some software blip of the likes. I uninstalled my drivers for my disc drive and reloaded them thinking that would fix the problem. Nope. Try again! I thought maybe it was something completely simple, like a virus. So I did a scan with Norton, and wouldn't you figure, about 3 things pop up that ironically, Norton couldn't quarantine and delete, yet freeware software like Lavasoft Ad-Aware picked them up and deleted them quicker and more flawlessly. I have to say, uninstalling Norton was the best decision of my computer life. But back on topic, no, the virus' were doing nothing. My disc drive could read DVDs, but it had forgotten how to read CD-Roms, and I say forgotten for a simple reason. If I could install the games, I should be able to play them using the very same disc I used to install. Yes, the discs were authentic. Needless to say, I was pretty pissed.

Why?

Because I just bought the fucking thing. Here I am, a month later, ironically after my "past-return" date and I'm thinking I have to use the warranty I paid 400 dollars for to replace my laptop, which will force me to buy yet another warranty. You may be thinking "well, that's what warranties are for!" but no sir... no sir I disagree.

Warranties should not even be needed. You can mask and make excuses for what warranties are good for, ie: Dropping, spilling, etc... but if you actually read your warranty it'll state something along the lines of, "this warranty is not applicable for abuse, and negligence." That means that if you drop it, it's abuse, if you spill it, it's abuse, if you leave it out in the sun, it's abuse. That means that the only way to really get the warranty honored is if God ate some bad turkey burritos that's coming back to haunt him, forcing a thunderbolt out his ass that just so happened to hit your laptop. Don't get me started on the uselessness of the "accessories" warranty. But we'll get to that later.

So, it's 1 o'clock at night and I catch myself saying "What the fuck, Mr. Snippets, have I not given you a good home? Have I not treated you with decency, you bastard!" I took Mr. Snippets and all his malfunctioning parts to the Best Buy in Ottawa, where they told me that they can't honour my warranty because I bought at another location, BUT, they said they would give me a phone number and manager name so that they can honour my warranty back at the store of purchase (which is why I stated the blurb above about me being pissed about spending the warranty). As disgruntled as I was, I held my frustration back and I went through the rest of my vacation with a sense of inconvenience.

Upon returning, I did go back to the original store of purchase and they replaced my computer for a slightly better one and I paid 100 dollars more... and it was open box 0_o. Second fatal mistake. But at least they allowed me to retain my warranty.

So I get to my girlfriend's house and I set my new shiny laptop down - Mr. Snippet's Jr. and... well, firstly, I upgraded the laptop because it had a 200 mgh more processor, and another hard drive. That's right, mother fuckers, my laptop has two hard drives. Anyway, I lay my new laptop down, start her up. Get to the desktop and....

[insert W.T.F here]

The laptop should've had two hard drives. two 60 gig drives. I was only seeing one (damn you and your open box blasphemy! It was previously used, you bastards!). I open the laptop up, thus, voiding my warranty... however, if the hard drive was stolen from the previous owner, they wouldn't be able to tell it was me... unless they accuse me of stealing the hard drive -_-.

I take it back to Best buy and-
Employee: "Hey look, the hard drive is gone!"
Me: "Hey yeah, no fucking shit. Don't you inspect your hardware when people return things?"
Employee: "No. We're not allowed to do that."

Good thing, though. They gave me a new hard drive in the computer free of charge (damn straight). Looks like their customer service is keeping it's side of the threshold. Take it home. Not a bloody problem. Mind you, the "back up discs" my good employee gave me for the laptop is... um... not working, but luckily I still had the old ones so I could reformat just fine and take it from there.

Fast forward 10 or so months. It's June and the wire on my charger module has gone to module heaven. I take my laptop to work where the cable is flexed a lot so I knew it was only a matter of time before it was going to break and I knew that broken, physically damaged items were not covered under the warranty, only manufacturing defects and God's turkey burrito. The break happened at the most inconvenient time. 10:00pm on a Sunday afternoon. Which means I have to call in to work sick on a Monday in order to go to Best buy in the morning to replace the module. Except, I knew what Best Buy would say, so I decided to look up the part number, both actual and the listed "back up/replacement" number on the back. The actual part number didn't exist, but the back number did and it said "Not in stock. Only stocked at retail locations." Score one for me!

The next day I pondered for a good 10 minutes whether or not I should bring the warranty. For a good reason. Let's assume that what I expect Best Buy to say is actually said. That means that both manufacturer and retail locations don't support my model of laptop anymore, which means that I can submit my warranty for a brand new laptop. I decided against it because Best Buy has had good customer service the last few times I needed my laptop "serviced."

Biggest mistake.

I get to Best Buy, bring the module and ask "Do you have a module like this in stock. Here is the part number and the laptop make and number." As you can see, I did all the fucking work for this guy and he responds, quick as a gun "You have to order that part from the manufacturer, we don't carry it."

"OH really?" I say cooly, "well, that's not what they say." Once again, I expected them to say this and because I expected it, I actually printed the very page that said they were supposed to in Black and White. The guy is speechless, he doesn't know what to do so he calls a junior manager. I know the real manager, he's a good guy, this guy may have had a different shirt than the rest of the cronies, but he was no head manager. This guy had a real arrogant walk to him and at that moment I regretted very much so for not bringing my warranty with me.

Junior begins inspecting my module... why he is, I'm not even sure, and he's says to me: "How did this break?"

After thinking about it for a few seconds... I say to myself 'what does this have to do with anything?' I respond "Wear and tear." He suppresses a smile and chuckles.

You son of a bitch!

"Excuse me," I say, "Let's be frank together. You and the manufacturer don't support the model of my module. That means that if I had brought my warranty, which I clearly didn't because I believed your customer service to be good, then I would get a new laptop. I did not bring my warranty card with me because I understand it's not covered under the warranty as it's damaged. I am here with my money to BUY another module. That module." I pointed to the broken piece of shit module.

He suppresses more smiles and hands me a Kensington module that apparently is "universal to all laptops," and it costs 200 dollars. I very very reluctantly bought the module. Strictly because I need my laptop for work. I cannot work without it and I can assure you my battery power cannot last four weeks waiting for a module... assuming I bitch to HP. I didn't do anything, but I should. This module is now breaking two months after purchase and it was 3 times the price of my original module. The connector on the computer side is slowly breaking apart. When it does, not only will I bring my old module to Best Buy, but I will bring this one, and I will bring my warranty and demand a new laptop.

This leads me to a very fine point, and an observation that I have made:

All corporations, it doesn't matter how big or small, but once they get the big bucks, it's "screw you and everyone else." Blizzard and their World of Warcraft - shitty customer service and shitty buck for the game. Ford - when your vehicle just so happens to past warranty and pretty much falls apart, instead of compensating or trying to help you legitimately fix the problems, they treat you like dirt, try to sell you a new car, and overprice all of the repairs to your vehicle. Apple's iPooh. It's amazing how the old versions work pretty well, but the newer versions can't even charge the batteries correctly. But hey, says Apple, send in your iPooh, pay for shipping and handling both ways, we'll pretend to fix it and in the end just say "Go buy a new one. You broked it!" True story, that happened to my sister.

Best Buy - once they have your money and it's been a while, hey fuck you, buy a new laptop because we can't support the shit you buy! That's why it's the best!

But hey, good news! I hear a Canada Computers has opened across the street. Seems as though I get the last laugh now, eh Bitch Buy?